You Know You’ve Made It As A Blogger When…
It’s often hard to gauge the ’success’ (if we can use that word although we really shouldn’t) of a blog. To some, 10 regular readers is a success yet to others only 100,000 will suffice. It’s all relative. And even then, rewards can vary and are often very subjective. Professional bloggers are successful because they make enough money to earn a living; I’m successful because I get the occasionally flattering email or comment that makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. Regardless, success is hard to measure. But there is one way…
Here are the steps, in ascending order, of knowing if you’re blog is successful:
1. You get automated spam comments advertising viagra, dental floss or facelifts
Receiving that first comment in your spam folder is such a lovely feeling. Finally you know that the world of the Interweb has accepted you into it’s emotionally scarred bosom. Enjoy this first moment and soak it up, it will never feel the same again.
2. You get automated spam emails from people looking to advertise their online casino or Flash based MMO on your blog
Now you’re warming up! Not only are the spammer targeting your comments section with automatic spam but they’re now sending you direct emails too! Those clever devils. Advertise for an online Chinese casino on my blog? Sure, thing! Need my bank account details to send me my massive cheque? Of course!
3. You get personalised spam comments from trolls
What’s that? Someone took several minutes out of their lives to think up poorly worded insults and badly written slurs? This is the sign you’re truly starting to make it as a blogger so savour every moment of it. Take a screenshot of those comments and email it to your mum for her to see your new found success.
4. You have your own nemesis
Ahh, now you’re starting to get really popular! Your own personal stalker who can’t write their own original blog posts and instead has to counter everything you say with their own parasitic rebuttal. The nemesis is rare and few and far between so count yourself lucky if you’re one of the few with their own personal stalker. And remember, underneath that veil of pretence is someone who admires you deeply.
5. You have your own parody
Whoa! Jackpot, baby! Imitation is the highest form of flattery, as they say. Very few bloggers have had their own parody before and it’s truly a sign of greatness when it happens. Highly sycophantic, incredibly funny and very flattering, just be wary that the person parodying you is probably fantasising about wearing your skin as a mask.
I reckon I’m just starting to edge into #3 and I’m looking forward to achieving the next few steps over the years to come (one can only hope). Where does your blog reside?