Star Trek Online: My Opinion
I never got the Star Trek universe. The entire thing just seems so illogical, unrealistic and silly to me. Giant space ships manned by altruistic species, filled to the brim with innocent civilians and recklessly flying into danger all in the name of the greater good? It makes no sense. If Star Trek was “real”, the Federation would be run by an army of a thousand obedient Datas, the original having been cloned in a transporter “accident” not long after being discovered, whilst every human spends their entire life within the confines of the holodeck, acting out the dirtiest and most deprived fantasies they could possibly imagine. They wouldn’t need to eat or drink or even leave to use the bathroom because some clever Starfleet scientist would’ve no doubt discovered how to beam food directly into their stomachs and excrement directly out of their bowels. That is the world of Stark Trek. And let me tell you now, the MMORPG is nothing like it.
I think it’s safe to say that I was never going to love Star Trek Online. I’m just not that big of a Trekkie and the notion of the game never really appealed to me. Still, I found that I didn’t dislike it either and I suppose that’s something. Rather I just feel quite ambivalent about the whole thing. It’s neither good nor bad, it is simply the epitome of average gaming. Right from the lackluster intro and predictable setting (everything’s got tits up the Alpha quadrant again? /yawn), through to the bog-standard and uninspired MMO gameplay the entire experience is an understatement of mediocrity.
The performance is pretty shaky, the graphics are not bad, the alien race creator is pretty cool, the away team missions are funnish but rather bland, it’s quite casual friendly, your little crewmen buddies are quite funky (I made my Bolian Engineer really fat), space combat is jarringly annoying and reminds me of when Riker used to the “manual steering column” to fly the Enterprise in Insurrection which then annoys me even more (can you tell I’m not a fan of mixing gameplay genres?). It’s definitely a game offers some nice features on one hand but then gives you a smack in the mouth with poor execution using the other.
For sure Star Trek Online is going to be a game that divides people. Some will undoubtedly love it whilst others totally hate it. I’m probably bobbing around somewhere in middle feeling not much at all. To be fair, I haven’t played it a huge amount (hence why this article is merely my opinion rather than me trying to palm off some sort of unqualified review) and maybe I would enjoy it more once I got deeper into the game. Although, thinking about it, I would counter that statement by arguing that if a game can’t suck me in within the first five or so hours then it probably doesn’t deserve my attention all.
If you’re a big Trekkie, bored, or just like the idea of running around Borg invested planets with some fat Bolian buddies then Star Trek will be right up your alley. Although I might check it out again one day in the future, I can safely say that it’s not the MMO for me as it failed to inspire or captivate my imagination. I’m glad I gave it a shot but now it’s time to invoke the Prime Directive, leave it’s ass be and move on. Oh c’mon, how could I not try to end the article on some awful Star Trek pun?