MMO Or Baby? Baby!

Ninja Baby

You all know my kid would be a badass

No, my wife isn’t pregnant. Yet. But it’s definitely on the cards – turns out the biological clock of a woman is an insane force to be reckoned with. Last time I likened it to a nuclear time bomb but I was wrong, it’s more like the most dangerous ninja on the planet, ready and waiting to attack. And attack she did. A couple of weeks ago I was awakened from a deep slumber in the middle of the night by the woman pouncing on me in a burst of animalistic sexual desire. It wasn’t until the deed had been done and she rolled off me with a smirk on her face that I realised just what had happened and a wave of utter terror flooded over me.

But I’m OK with it and have slowly come to terms with the fact that even though my MMO days may be numbered, having a child is probably worth it. Probably. Plus, in all likelihood, it will take a few months because she gets up the duff and then there’s the whole nine month incubation period so I reckon it will be at least a year before Gordon Jr appears. That’s enough time to soak up SW:TOR, The Secret World and any other exciting new MMORPGs before my life officially ends.

I’m trying to remain positive though and, yes, yes, deep down I do want kids and I suppose, if I’m being honest, I have been having moments of rather manly broodiness. Giving up, or at least severely cutting down, my MMO hobby is going to be downright tricky though and a difficult lifestyle adjustment for me to make. Not just because having a kid will impact my cyber social life but also because it represents such a monumental step forward for me as a human being, accompanied by a huge amount of responsibility. I hope I can manage.

I’m sure it will be worth it though and I’d hate to pass up the opportunity to have children and then turn around in 10 or 20 years time and really regret it. After all, one of the prime motivators and points to life is to reproduce and no matter how evolved or intelligent we think we are, we’re still just basic creatures driven by the instinct to continue our bloodline. I guess in many ways, it’s really the most rewarding and important thing we could do with our lives – just ask the sperm donor in Canada who fathered between 500 – 1000 children.

So yeah, I do want kids and I am feeling rather good about it all. Let’s just hope the birth of any impending child doesn’t clash with the next WoW expansion though. I’d hate to miss the birth because I was raiding.


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  1. MMO Or Baby?
  2. I’m Your Hero, Baby
  3. MMORPGs Are A Lot Like Women
  4. I’m Not Sure I’d Want My Kids Playing MMOs
  5. Heading To Japan


  1. Longasc says:

    I bet you can train your kid to do dailies. At the age of 8 he or she might be already guild or raid leader.

    Good luck! And don’t be a Don Draper! :)

  2. Akely says:

    I think you pretty much summed it up when it comes to fears and thoughts that most people have. I say people, because I know that women go through similar though processes too.

    And to sum it up: yeah, there will be less gaming. There will be less sleep. Less money. But there will be more work. Less time on your own though. All in all, you’ll love it because kids are effing magical when it comes to spreading joy. Especially when it is your own.

    As for the making stuff. You should go for it like bunnies the days the Mrs is most likely to be firtile. And just to be sure every other day too. Practice makes perfact.

    • Gordon says:

      “Especially when it is your own.”

      That’s what I’m hoping. In fact, I’m just assuming there’s some kind of natural biological impulse that kicks in once kids come along to stop men from being terrible fathers :D

  3. Void says:

    I have a one year old and a full time job but I still find time every night to game. It’s not as much time as I used to devote but it’s totally worth it. And don’t forget, it’s your kid, they’ll be interested in the things you are. My daughter is only one but she already loves watching Starcraft 2 with me. I just wanted to give you a parent’s perspective, I have less time to myself but I don’t regret it at all and I still make time to do what I like to do.

  4. Jason says:

    Having kids is pretty awesome; I’ve got 4 and one more on the way. So, I can say fairly definitively that the impacts on sleep and gaming are pretty short-term; once they get a year or so old, you can game with them on your lap, or when they wake up at night and just want to be cuddled for an hour or two to go back to sleep also presents a good opportunity to get some time in. With regard to MMOs specifically, I don’t know that I’ve ever had more cash on hand in one than right after my kids were born, because of all the times I’d spend with them sitting in a char and rocking them back to sleep.

  5. bhagpuss says:

    Once you get past the first few months you’ll have tons of time. Little kids sleep a LOT.

    Once they get past that stage there’s another long period when they think everything you do is fascinating and brilliant so you can get them playing or watching you play.

    After that they think everything you do is SO DUMB! And you are SO EMBARASSING. They’ll be in their rooms and won’t care what you’re doing so you can game all you like.

    And then they go to college.

    Really, get through the first year and you’ll barely notice the difference.

  6. AFK says:

    Don’t worry, your gaming life won’t be over. You’ll just need to be a little more selective as to what you want to play, as you won’t have time for every game out there. We just celebrated our son’s 1st birthday and I still find time to game just about every night. You might have to start making some choices like… sleep or gaming, but you’ll figure out a routine.

    Also, don’t be too scared of taking the plunge into fatherhood. You’ll be freaking out for that last month of pregnancy, but once the child is born you’ll become a whole new person. It’s totally worth it.

    As far as everyone else saying that their children are interested in whatever they do… I’m starting to see it already. My son never seems more happy then when I sit him on my lap in front of my pc. He’s already a gamer!

  7. Stabs says:

    Is it too early to sign up Gordon Junior as an item farmer? Very formative experience for a child.

  8. I’ve been told that after a year of non-gaming that its more than plausible to get back into the games. One mate of mine had twins, and was our main tank, with a child on his arm. Apparently tanks can do that too!

  9. Sarie says:

    “I’d hate to pass up the opportunity to have children and then turn around in 10 or 20 years time and really regret it.”

    You know what’s worse? Having the kid and regretting having it. It’s not like you can return it…

    I’m a woman and I understand you’re on the fence about it, because I am too. But one thing that’s different for my husband and me is that we talk about this, and don’t automatically assume that we know what the other wants or don’t want. And we would never, ever have a child unless BOTH of us want to. A child is a life-changer.

    In life, it’s true that regretting that you didn’t do something is a bigger regret than if you did, but I believe 100% that the opposite is true for kids: regretting that you had kids is infinitely worse than regretting that you didn’t. Some people seethe with resentment of their child for its entire life — you think it doesn’t know? And other people just pretend or try to convince themselves they love their child, because obviously there’s a stigma attached to thinking that parenthood is anything but fluffy rainbows and The Most Important Job in the World(TM).

    This entire post sent alarms going off in my head, and I’m sorry if I’m overstepping here. I don’t know either of you, so I guess you could just dismiss what I said as complete hogwash because it doesn’t apply to you. And it probably doesn’t. But I guess I couldn’t let it go without voicing my opinions/concerns.

  10. anon says:

    so… your spouse raped you and you simply shrug it off and say ‘oh well, i guess i want it too’…

  11. I guess I’ve been reading your blog for a long time and I am getting to be familiar with your style of writing, because despite your jokes, I get the feeling that deep down, yeah you do want kids :) So the time to do the things you do will probably go down, but if it is what you want, I’m sure it will all be worth it. And other commenters have talked about how your kids and you will probably share the same interests, which usually is true. Just imagine when the time comes being able to share your love of gaming with your child, I can’t think of anything more awesome :)

  12. amcl says:

    Go for it wee bro! Make the Earth shake! And have fun!

    You’ve got a small part to play, but an important one ;)

  13. vortal says:

    It’s all about Balance.

    Also video games (MMOs in your case) aren’t that bad, they’re definitely more interactive than that death machine called Television.

    At least with child orientated video games you can spend some real quality time with your son/daughter rather than sitting there at the tele eating chips.

    When they’re old enough they can find out you’re a MMO nerd, but by then he/she probably wouldn’t care.

  14. Utakata says:

    I certainly quite happy to be single, child free and playing MMO’s for the rest of my life. With 7 billion people, we don’t need more children. Instead, let’s have fun and play like the kids we where. <3

  15. Epiny says:

    I honestly like that you are considering giving up MMOs all together when you have a kid. I’ve seen to many people try and balance them only to neglect their kids. I remember back in in my Senior year in High School one of my guild mates in EQ kept complaining that his kids were distracting him. I told him to get off EQ and be a parent. He didn’t like that answer.

    It took me along time to find a balance and honestly video games help me be a better parent because it gives me something to unwind with. However I never play video games when my kids are awake. That time is spent with them… once in a great while I’ll game but that’s maybe once a year. My daugther is finally at the age that she wants to play video games so I’m slowly exposing them to her, with me monitoring her the entire time.

  16. Espen says:

    Don’t worry Gordy, babies go to bed early, and wow will come in handy when the crying stops you from sleeping.

  17. Shuttler says:

    I clocked this post the post the other day and made a diary note to come back and write a comment. Why did I not make the comment on the spot? Because I was late picking up the kids from school ;)

    Either way I was compelled to write a comment because I actually found more time for MMO’s when my daughter came along 10 years ago. I was playing the SWG beta (my first MMO) and was hooked I recall thinking this can’t last long, but the fact is the baby needs to sleep with the mother LOTS and instead of going out for meals and nights out with your partner you will have time to do things like game! Plus your awake in the middle of the night more, often struggling to go back to sleep I’d fire up SWG and go exploring.

    As time passed and my kids got older I still find time for MMOs although it may be one or two nights a week.

    Then now my kids are even older we play Lego Universe or Free Realms together. Play Mario Kart and other games and to be honest it is tons of fun!

    Kids see the charm in games without all the nit-picking so when you play a game with them its more honest and fun :D

    I’m excited for you

  18. Skutrug says:

    I play with my two girls now: 9 and 13 … It’s awesome to have 2 pocket healers on all the time. I can go full DPS :-) I almost wish I had made 3 more… The first 2 years are a bit boring but after that I had one on my laps most of the time : 2 pairs of eyes do better than one for PvP. With any luck things will take a little longer to start and you will enjoy a few more wild nights

  19. Expert Novice says:

    You make her sound so… evil. Women are so sneaky!

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